ADVICE FOR A NEW YEAR
Live in the moment.
Maintain balance in your life.
Choose your thoughts wisely.
Have more fun and laugh more.
Do new things that challenge you.
Be kind to yourself and others.
RIDDLES
01. How come no one listens to New Year’s resolutions?
02. Knock knock! Who’s there? Cheese. Cheese who?
03. Knock knock! Who’s there? Razor. Razor who?
04. Knock knock. Who’s there? Abby. Abby who?
05. My new year’s resolution is to procrastinate.
06. Name the most recent year in which New Year’s came before Christmas.
07. Not to brag, but I already have a date for New Year’s Eve.
08. They say New York has the best New Year’s Eve Party…
09. What did the cheerleaders say on New Year’s Day?
10. What did the farmer give his wife on New Year’s Eve?
11. What do comedians spend a lot of time doing on New Year’s Eve?
12. What do snowmen like to do on New Year’s Eve?
13. What do you say to someone when you see them after the ball drops on New Year’s?
14. What does a Ghost say on January 1st?
15. What does a monster say on New Year’s?
16. What happened to the fireworks who were arrested on New Year’s Eve?
17. What happened to the woman who stole a calendar on New Year’s Eve?
18. What is a New Year’s resolution?
19. What is corn’s favorite day of the year?
20. What should you never eat on New Year’s Eve?
21. What’s a New Year’s resolution?
22. What’s a cow’s favorite night of the year?
23. What’s the easiest resolution to keep?
24. What’s the easiest way to keep your New Year’s resolution to read more?
25. What’s the one group that hates New Year’s Day?
26. Where can you find comedians at a New Year’s Eve party?
27. Where is New Year’s Eve so Mathematical?
28. Why are there so many vampires out on New Year’s Eve?
29. Why did the boy have to go to the doctor on New Year’s Day?
30. Why do birds fly south for New Year’s Eve?
31. Why do so many people smile in December?
32. Why do you need a jeweler on New Year’s Eve?
33. Why does the person who runs Time’s Square on New Year’s feel like a failure?
34. Why should you put your new calendar in the freezer?
35. Why shouldn’t you go jogging on New Year’s Eve?
ANSWERS
-A to-do list for the first week of January
-Abby New Year
-Chill out
-December 31st
-Fire crackers
-For Old Fangs Time
-For cheese a jolly good fellow
-Happy New Cheer
-Happy New Fear
-Happy boo year
-He always drops the ball
-Hogs and kisses
-I haven’t seen you since last year
-I will wait till tomorrow to start
-I’d say it’s overrated — every year they drop the ball
-In the punchline
-It’s The Most Wonderful Time of the Year
-It’s too far to walk
-Moo Year’s Eve
-New Ear’s Day
-Put the subtitles on your TV
-Razor glass and toast the New Year
-She got 12 months
-Something that goes in one year and out the other
-The New Year’s Eve’s clean-up crew
-The ice falls out of your drinks
-They go in one year and out the other
-They were let off
-This year, I’m going to be myself
-This year. New Year’s always comes before Christmas
-Times Square
-To ring in the new year
-To start off the new year in a cool way
-Too many punches Waiting for a punchline
-Waiting for a punchline
ANSWERS
ʞๅɐʍ oʇ ɹɐɟ ooʇ s’ʇI ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɹoɟ ɥʇnos ʎๅɟ spɹᴉq op ʎɥM
sǝɥɔund ʎuɐɯ ooꓕ ¿ʎɐꓷ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ɹoʇɔop ǝɥʇ oʇ oɓ oʇ ǝʌɐɥ ʎoq ǝɥʇ pᴉp ʎɥM
ǝɯᴉꓕ sɓuɐꓞ pๅO ɹoꓞ ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ʇno sǝɹᴉdɯɐʌ ʎuɐɯ os ǝɹǝɥʇ ǝɹɐ ʎɥM
ǝɹɐnbS sǝɯᴉꓕ ¿ๅɐɔᴉʇɐɯǝɥʇɐW os ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN sᴉ ǝɹǝɥM
ǝuᴉๅɥɔund ǝɥʇ uI ¿ʎʇɹɐd ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɐ ʇɐ suɐᴉpǝɯoɔ puᴉɟ noʎ uɐɔ ǝɹǝɥM
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ꓥꓕ ɹnoʎ uo sǝๅʇᴉʇqns ǝɥʇ ʇnꓒ ¿ǝɹoɯ pɐǝɹ oʇ uoᴉʇnๅosǝɹ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɹnoʎ dǝǝʞ oʇ ʎɐʍ ʇsǝᴉsɐǝ ǝɥʇ s’ʇɐɥM
ɟๅǝsʎɯ ǝq oʇ ɓuᴉoɓ ɯ’I ʻɹɐǝʎ sᴉɥꓕ ¿dǝǝʞ oʇ uoᴉʇnๅosǝɹ ʇsǝᴉsɐǝ ǝɥʇ s’ʇɐɥM
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sɹǝʞɔɐɹɔ ǝɹᴉꓞ ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ʇɐǝ ɹǝʌǝu noʎ pๅnoɥs ʇɐɥM
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ɹǝɥʇo ǝɥʇ ʇno puɐ ɹɐǝʎ ǝuo uᴉ sǝoɓ ʇɐɥʇ ɓuᴉɥʇǝɯoS ¿uoᴉʇnๅosǝɹ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɐ sᴉ ʇɐɥM
sɥʇuoɯ ՇƖ ʇoɓ ǝɥS ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ɹɐpuǝๅɐɔ ɐ ǝๅoʇs oɥʍ uɐɯoʍ ǝɥʇ oʇ pǝuǝddɐɥ ʇɐɥM
ɟɟo ʇǝๅ ǝɹǝʍ ʎǝɥꓕ ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo pǝʇsǝɹɹɐ ǝɹǝʍ oɥʍ sʞɹoʍǝɹᴉɟ ǝɥʇ oʇ pǝuǝddɐɥ ʇɐɥM
ɹɐǝꓞ ʍǝN ʎddɐH ¿s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ʎɐs ɹǝʇsuoɯ ɐ sǝop ʇɐɥM
ɹɐǝʎ ooq ʎddɐH ¿ʇsƖ ʎɹɐnuɐſ uo ʎɐs ʇsoɥꓨ ɐ sǝop ʇɐɥM
ɹɐǝʎ ʇsɐๅ ǝɔuᴉs noʎ uǝǝs ʇ’uǝʌɐɥ I ¿s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo sdoɹp ๅๅɐq ǝɥʇ ɹǝʇɟɐ ɯǝɥʇ ǝǝs noʎ uǝɥʍ ǝuoǝɯos oʇ ʎɐs noʎ op ʇɐɥM
ʇno ๅๅᴉɥꓛ ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo op oʇ ǝʞᴉๅ uǝɯʍous op ʇɐɥM
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sǝssᴉʞ puɐ sɓoH ¿ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ǝɟᴉʍ sᴉɥ ǝʌᴉɓ ɹǝɯɹɐɟ ǝɥʇ pᴉp ʇɐɥM
ɹǝǝɥꓛ ʍǝN ʎddɐH ¿ʎɐꓷ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN uo ʎɐs sɹǝpɐǝๅɹǝǝɥɔ ǝɥʇ pᴉp ʇɐɥM
ๅๅɐq ǝɥʇ doɹp ʎǝɥʇ ɹɐǝʎ ʎɹǝʌǝ — pǝʇɐɹɹǝʌo s’ʇᴉ ʎɐs p’I …ʎʇɹɐꓒ ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ʇsǝq ǝɥʇ sɐɥ ʞɹo⅄ ʍǝN ʎɐs ʎǝɥꓕ
ʇsƖƐ ɹǝqɯǝɔǝꓷ ·ǝʌƎ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɹoɟ ǝʇɐp ɐ ǝʌɐɥ ʎpɐǝɹๅɐ I ʇnq ʻɓɐɹq oʇ ʇoN
sɐɯʇsᴉɹɥꓛ ǝɹoɟǝq sǝɯoɔ sʎɐʍๅɐ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ·ɹɐǝʎ sᴉɥꓕ ·sɐɯʇsᴉɹɥꓛ ǝɹoɟǝq ǝɯɐɔ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ɥɔᴉɥʍ uᴉ ɹɐǝʎ ʇuǝɔǝɹ ʇsoɯ ǝɥʇ ǝɯɐN
ʇɹɐʇs oʇ ʍoɹɹoɯoʇ ๅๅᴉʇ ʇᴉɐʍ ๅๅᴉʍ I ·ǝʇɐuᴉʇsɐɹɔoɹd oʇ sᴉ uoᴉʇnๅosǝɹ s’ɹɐǝʎ ʍǝu ʎW
ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ʎqqⱯ ¿oɥʍ ʎqqⱯ ·ʎqqⱯ ¿ǝɹǝɥʇ s’oɥM ·ʞɔouʞ ʞɔouꓘ
ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN ǝɥʇ ʇsɐoʇ puɐ ssɐๅɓ ɹozɐꓤ ¿oɥʍ ɹozɐꓤ ·ɹozɐꓤ ¿ǝɹǝɥʇ s’oɥM ¡ʞɔouʞ ʞɔouꓘ
ʍoๅๅǝɟ pooɓ ʎๅๅoſ ɐ ǝsǝǝɥɔ ɹoꓞ ¿oɥʍ ǝsǝǝɥꓛ ·ǝsǝǝɥꓛ ¿ǝɹǝɥʇ s’oɥM ¡ʞɔouʞ ʞɔouꓘ
ɹǝɥʇo ǝɥʇ ʇno puɐ ɹɐǝʎ ǝuo uᴉ oɓ ʎǝɥꓕ ¿suoᴉʇnๅosǝɹ s’ɹɐǝ⅄ ʍǝN oʇ suǝʇsᴉๅ ǝuo ou ǝɯoɔ ʍoH