Stool Stories

This daily event is often the cause of embarrassment, mirth, and
opportunities for the jokesters among us.


Moonbeam is a very happy and active sheltie. He loves to spin, his version of dancing with joy. Whenever it is time for a visiting friend to leave, he rushes down the stairs, out the doggie door, and races to the end of the fence before the two-legged reaches the end of the walkway. He does this barking all the way. This time, he did something so unusual it made us both laugh so hard our sides were aching. As he was barking and spinning running to the end of the fence, he was also pooping, flinging the stuff in all directions looking like a brown carousel. Yep, never a dull moment with him!



Had a doctor’s appointment awhile ago. Told my physician I was experiencing some problems with my stool looking far from normal. Asked her to please let me know if there was any reason for concern. She put on gloves and took the sample elsewhere to assess the problem. A short time later, I heard her shout my name.

Scroll to the end only if you wish to see the stool sample given to my doctor, and the reason she shouted my name after observing it. Very graphic so beware!


See Everyday Miracles – May 2023 … blog post
See You Don’t Know …. blog post.



Informative with stories that had me laughing.
The following is one of those stories…

High on a dusty escarpment jutting skyward from camp, a man named Henry, having scrambled up there and squeezed in behind what appeared to be the ideal bush for camouflage, began lowering himself precariously into a deep knee bend. Far below, just out of their bedrolls, three fellow river runners began violating the profound quiet of canyon’s first light by poking about the commissary, cracking eggs, snapping twigs, and sloshing out the coffee pot. Through the branches, our pretzel man on the hill observed the breakfast preparations while proceeding with his own morning mission. To the earth it finally fell, round and firm, this sturdy turd. With a bit more encouragement from gravity, it rolled slowly out from between Henry’s big boots, threaded its way through the spindly trunks of the “ideal” bush, and then truly taking on a mind of its own, leaped into the air like a downhill skier out of the gate.

You can see the dust trail of a fast-moving pickup mushrooming off a dirt road long after you’ve lost sight of the truck. Henry watched, wide-eyed and helpless, as a similar if smaller cloud billowed up defiantly below him, and the actual item became obscured from view. Zigging and zagging, it caromed off rough spots in the terrain. Madly it bumped and tumbled and dropped, making its run as though through a giant pinball machine. Gaining momentum, gathering its own little avalanche, round and down it came, spinning like a buried back tire spraying up sand. All too fast it raced down the steep slope — until it became locked into that deadly slow motion common to the fleeting seconds just preceding all imminent, unalterable disasters. With one last bounce, one final effort at heavenward orbit, this unruly escaped goof ball (followed in the same trajectory by an arcing tail of debris) landed in a terminal thud and a rain of pebbly clutter not six inches from the bare foot of the woman measuring out coffee.


GOTCHA!

2 thoughts on “Stool Stories”

  1. Moonbeam is so cute he can even play broadcast fertilizer spreader and come out adorable!
    I was born old and grumpy, so I’ve never understood the humor in scatological humor. Did appreciate the play on words practical joke, though. Nice set-up! 🙂

  2. funny shared story I remember you telling me this awhile ago. of course minus the moonbeam excitement story of course. he is quite a character for sure.

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