CUP OF COFFEE
A sweet little boy surprised his grandmother one morning and brought her a cup of coffee. He made it himself and he was so proud. Anxiously, he waited to hear the verdict. The grandmother in all her life had never had such a bad cup of coffee. As she forced down the last sip, his grandmother noticed three of those little green army guys were in the bottom of the cup.
She asked, “Honey, why would three of your little army men be in the bottom of my cup?”
Her grandson replied, “You know grandma, it’s like on TV. ‘The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup’.”
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, “What does love mean?”
“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” Billy – age 4
“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.” Bobby – age 7 (Wow!)
“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,” Nikka – age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka’s on this planet)
“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.” Mary Ann – age 4
“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.” (what an image) Karen – age 7
Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, “Nothing, I just helped him cry”
A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”
One bright little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”
SCIENCE TEST ANSWERS
These answers illustrate If you don’t know the answer, be creative.
Q: Name the four seasons. / A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. / A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed? / A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this!) / A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? / A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids? / A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age? / A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes / A: Premature death.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g, abdomen.) / A: The body is consisted into three parts – the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What is the fibula? / A: A small lie.
Q: What does “varicose” mean? (I love this one…) / A: Nearby.
Q: What does the word “benign” mean?’ (my favorite…) / A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
